VICTOR SHARPE: LIFE IN THE AGE OF OBAMA
LIFE IN THE AGE OF OBAMA
The policies of this increasingly imperial president, and the uncritical support of his lackeys and sycophants in the mainstream media, may not seem funny, indeed they are dire, but there is a time for humor as a necessary tool to help overcome the unbearable.
Take, for instance, what President Obama is formulating. He has alienated so many erstwhile friendly governments that in planning to tour what allies we have left, his itinerary will include leaving on Tuesday and returning on Wednesday; including a golf lesson in Florida with Tiger Woods.
Additionally, President Obama has slashed the NASA Space Program so much so that in future all astronauts who venture into space will have to pay their own fare. And the president’s social policies have led to a serious decline in morals in one unnamed city in New England. This was highlighted by a survey revealing that two hundred married women had made love to an unmarried man. The man is now recovering in a local hospital.
The IRS during the Obama era has gotten an even worse name. Apparently a mad dog bit an income tax inspector. After being given shots and treatment for shock, the dog has now been allowed to return home.
Worse still, senior citizens are feeling the pinch as Obamacare increasingly takes hold. Hospitals will soon be offering reduced costs to seniors provided they are accompanied by their parents. And the Obama regime has announced new plans for reducing the length of lines at unemployment offices. People will henceforth be asked to stand closer to each other.
Also, President Obama is shortly to announce new plans to avoid everyone becoming poor when they reach the age of 65. He is making certain that everyone is poor when they reach forty.
Democrat politicians in Congress continue to refuse to listen to empirical facts about how the president’s policies are ruining the economy and our foreign relations. It has become so bad that two eminent ear, nose and throat specialists were recently called in to examine the ears of a leading Democrat senator. When asked what they saw when they looked into the senator’s ears they both replied that they saw each other.
And it has been reported that many government union workers have insisted that they have never had a day’s illness in their lives. They have always made it last a week. And an unnamed insider at the White House has claimed that the president has foreign policy pretensions of grandeur. He wants to be as powerful as Genghis Khan. The insider though assures us that the president will end up much more like Genghis Khant.
More revelations are coming out about Obamacare. Apparently hidden in the thousands of pages that no one has read, after Nancy Pelosi told them not to do so, is the following innovation to be introduced in hospitals in 2014. A hospital bell will now be rung once if you need something, twice if it’s urgent and three times if it’s too late.
And now a problem has arisen at the Library of Congress. Apparently, President Obama’s State of the Union Addresses since 2009 were all cataloged under the heading: fiction.
There is news that an unemployed man was arrested outside the White House for shouting that the Administration is crazy. He was fined $20 for being drunk and jailed for ten years for revealing state secrets.
And, unless the president does an FDR and is given a third term in office, there is only four more years of this left to endure.
Copyright © Victor Sharpe
With grateful attribution to the wit of two of Britain’s funniest comedians, Ronnie Barker and Ronnie Corbett, whose humor in the late 1970s was a treasure. Their absurdity is well adapted to life in the age of Obama.
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