RUTHFULLY YOURS

The Supreme Court of Iceland has ordered a halt to road construction because of the environmental impact on the elves. Most of the modern world no longer believes in elves, fairies or gnomes; but environmentalists still do.

Members of the environmentalist terrorist group Earth Liberation Front refer to themselves as “elves” and to their acts of sabotage and vandalism as “elving” or “pixieing.” Environmentalist eco-pagans divided themselves into “fairies” and “trolls” with the fairies sticking to non-violence while the trolls were more apt to get physical.

The Dragon Environmental Network, which in its own words “links environmental action with magical practice,” is one of the more successful environmental neo-pagan activist groups. DEN boasts of using “eco-magic” to stop progress and “channel positive energy.” The basic principles of their environmental activism include “honoring the fair folk”; better known as the fairies.

Trolls, fairies, goblins and elves are easy enough to laugh off and those who believe in them can be dismissed as irrational; but the fairy hunters fool more people when they slip out of their tunics and pointed ears and slip on their white lab coats and parkas.

The “Australasian Antarctic Expedition” set off to another cold place not in search of elves, but in search of melting ice.  Unlike the original expedition it knew exactly what it wanted to find. One of the purposes of the expedition was to “determine the extent to which human activity and pollution has directly impacted on this remote region of Antarctica.”

Considering the shortage of human activities in Antarctica, the reasonable answer would be zero, but the elves in parkas weren’t interested in being reasonable. They were out to provide a few more reels of propaganda showing that human industry was destroying the planet.

The AAE was supposed to provide supporting evidence that the East Antarctic Ice Sheet was on the verge of collapsing and melting. Instead it got trapped in the ice that wasn’t supposed to exist. A blizzard set in surrounding their vessel with pack ice and an expedition member who took off his gloves to write an email couldn’t move his fingers as they turned white.

The Snow Dragon, a Chinese icebreaker dispatched to save the AAE expedition vessel, MV Akademik Shokalskiy, from its own stupidity was forced to turn back because of the heavy ice. A French ship, L’Astrolabe, also had to pull out. Now the fate of the Warmist expedition rests with the Australian icebreaker, the Aurora Australis.

It’s not the first time that Warmists went looking for warming in the coldest places on earth and found only frozen ice.

This summer, MainStream Last First attempted to bring attention to the threat of melting ice by crossing the Northwest Passage in a rowboat. The effort was dubbed as a voyage made possibly only by climate change. Instead it also ran up against the ice that wasn’t there.

“This has been the coldest season with the most ice since we started Arctic Watch in 2000,” the expedition’s final entry quoted. “Almost no whales. The NWPassage is still blocked with ice. Some of the bays still have not melted!”

But true believers in elf magic and cow flatulence don’t give up easily even when surrounded by acres of evidence to the contrary. The entry concluded: “Our message remains unaffected though, bringing awareness to the pressing issues of climate change in the arctic.”

In the spring, another Warmist expedition set out to cross Antarctica and “make a decisive contribution to our understanding of the effect of climate change upon the poles.” It lost its leader, the explorer Ranulph Fiennes, who came down with frostbite and whose evacuation was delayed by a blizzard. Then the expedition had to be halted due to the difficulty and announced that it was turning its attention to science education instead.

Science education might have helped avoid the whole fiasco, but Warmists never learn from science or from recent history. No matter how often they freeze off their toes or have to be airlifted from the ruins of their ridiculous publicity stunts, they insist that the warming is there.

If you just click your green mukluks together three times and wish upon a Carbon economy.

In March, a Congressional hearing on global warming was snowed out. In February, a “Forward on Climate” rally in Washington complete with idiots in polar bear costumes waving signs reading, “Hands Off the Arctic” shivered through the cold. And finally, the White House convened its Task Force on Climate Preparedness this winter while the nation’s capital was shut down by a blizzard.

“You don’t need a weatherman/To know which way the wind blows,” Bob Dylan famously sang. But unlike their more famous scientific peers, the weathermen actually do know which way the wind is blowing. A quarter of them say that global warming is a scam. Only a third believe in man-caused global warming, or cow-caused, as the case may be.

The professional Warmist PhDs sneer at the weathermen, but unlike the theoretical experts, the local weatherman actually has to get the weekend forecast right. If he doesn’t, there will be real people angry at him for telling them that the sun would shine when instead it rained for three days straight. He can’t refuse to release his data or lecture angry viewers that the rain they’re experiencing is only an anomaly.

The Warmist PhDs are as detached from the vicissitudes of real weather as the Dragon Environmental Network is from the laws of physics. They make their money from grants financed by special interests hoping to ram through a carbon tax and turn their investments into a massive carbon economy. They don’t care about accurate weather predictions. Instead they hide their data and reinterpret it so that the sky is always falling and the ice is always melting even in the coldest of blizzards.

Every now and then an Arctic expedition into the ice that isn’t supposed to be there comes face to face with the fact that the polar ice doesn’t seem to be aware of their settled science. But just as the lack of elves never disproves the need for elf environmental impact studies, all the ice in the arctic can’t stop the wannabe elves in their expensive parkas from believing that technology is destroying the world.

The left likes to claim that it’s part of the reality-based community. But the reality that it’s based on exists only in the human imagination. The unreal left lives in an imaginary world of fantasy economics where money is infinite, in a world of fantasy science where cow flatulence is the greatest threat to mankind and in a world of imaginary politics where everything is possible if only they believe it is true.

A sufficiently advanced technology may be indistinguishable from magic, but the left’s ideological eco-magic is no substitute for science.

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