Federal Bureau of Inanity: FBI Plans Coloring Event for Agents By Catherine Salgado ?????!!!!
Besides stepping us their attacks on Democrats’ political opponents in the last year, the increasingly woke FBI is reportedly descending to the level of the infantile for work events. According to several former FBI agents and whistleblowers, the agency is planning fun events for on-duty employees including office yoga (you don’t have to leave your chair!), painting, and coloring with crayons. Thank goodness adults are in charge of the country, right?
FBI whistleblower Steve Friend went on fellow FBI whistleblower Kyle Seraphin’s podcast March 31 to discuss the ridiculous FBI events for which he provided a screenshot on Twitter. Seraphin said FBI Human Resources and Security executive Jennifer Moore, who suspended both Seraphin and Friend, is like a crazy kindergarten teacher. She certainly appears to be under the impression that FBI agents are kindergartners.
Planned events for the FBI Security Division for April and May to enhance “health and wellness” reportedly include “National Walking Day,” which involves a “short walk” so you can “get to know your colleagues” and return with “a renewed sense of productivity.” Next is “Office Yoga,” which involves “a series of simple movements to strengthen and stretch the whole body while seated in a chair.” A desk jockey’s dream! Then there’s “Lunch and Coloring,” a “fun series of coloring sessions” to showcase “your colleagues’ artistic sides,” with supplies provided. Finally, there’s “National Creativity Day,” also an opportunity to “unleash your creativity” in a “painting class.” Makes you feel good your taxes pay these people’s salaries, doesn’t it?
What do any of these events have to do with being better FBI agents, you ask? I guess it relaxes agents after chasing down parents who attend school board meetings, pro-life protestors, or Trump allies. It’s so stressful being a political hack.
”This is paid FBI employees on duty doing this, correct?” asked Seraphin. Friend replied in the affirmative. Seraphin said he knew the leaked agenda was real not only because of his experience with the FBI, but because another former FBI agent, who chimed in from off-screen, noted that this is not the first time the agency has given its employees coloring books and crayons to “color away the stress.” As Seraphin put it, “Your FBI employees are spending their time on duty to just relieve the stress of being a highly paid, underworked government employee by coloring or finger-painting.”
Both Friend and Seraphin mocked the FBI by discussing other potential “activities,” like glue-eating. “These are not serious people. They are charged with — supposedly — monitoring whether or not folks like you and I are worthy of having top security clearances,” Friend commented to Seraphin. Instead of doing the “work of the American people,” FBI employees are playing with crayons.
Earlier in the podcast episode, Seraphin and Friend discussed the peril of the self-esteem movement, which ties in with the nonsensical FBI events. For several decades now, institutions have become increasingly obsessed with building up “self-esteem,” as if mere arrogance is a benefit in and of itself, regardless of merit or behavior. There are schools that changed their grading systems or stopped failing students because of self-esteem. There are people from toddlers to the elderly who believe they are great musicians or poets, when their art makes others inwardly cringe. Americans have become increasingly self-obsessed while simultaneously becoming less competent, less self-disciplined, and less accomplished.
And not only are “positive” lies treated as better than “negative” truths, but the more competent are held back or discouraged in order to pander to the lazy or the struggling. Actual dishonesty is not only encouraged but demanded, and so there is no improvement — why improve if you’re already amazing?
So what does the self-esteem movement have to do with federal agents breaking out crayons and paints at work-sponsored events? The events are opportunities to display agents’ “creativity” or help them de-stress. In other words, they have nothing whatsoever to do with the FBI agents’ duties or jobs, but purely with making them “feel” better. The Lunch and Coloring event, the Office Yoga, and the painting class won’t make more capable agents, but they will boost self-esteem. Self-confidence is prioritized over competence, and competence (and honesty) therefore becomes increasingly scarce.
These FBI events are exactly the sort of taxpayer-funded inanity that the self-esteem movement brings us.
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